You know those greeting cards with the animals that have normal bodies and enormous cartoon eyes? Well, it's a little known fact that American Greetingz contacted me several years ago because they know I am a veritable font of inspiration. As luck would have it, I had just been to a Christmas party, where my friend Gillion had very generously lent us her handsome plastic-rimmed specs. Weren't we surprised!

Don't laugh. I own the rights to the idea of comically large eyeballs.

Jan brings his Viennese good looks to any trendy eyewear.

Can Gillion believe her eyes? Can any of us, really?

C'mere a little closer so Auntie Fern can see how big you are now!

Hello, World!